Monday, January 07, 2008

Revealed: The Secrets of Science Fiction's Silliest Religion

The Daily Mail reports that Tom Cruise is reportedly furious over claims by Diana author Andrew Morton:
  • Cruise is Xenu's number two earthling
  • Daughter by Katie Holmes "conceived like Rosemary's Baby"
  • Nicole Kidman "feared blackmail" over sex tapes made with Scientologists
  • Scientologists "planted meadow of flowers for Tom and Nicole to run through"
  • Cruise's next mission for Xenu is to recruit David Beckham
I can certainly see how the allegations of a flower meadow hoax might anger the Days of Thunder star.

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"Austin Mayor" is not a real name. "Austin Mayor" is not a title. "Austin Mayor" is a pseudonym. "Austin Mayor" is a simulacrum. "Austin Mayor" is performance art. "Austin Mayor" is a brand without a product. "Austin Mayor" is your imaginary friend.